Perform like a leader
“The worst among foolish men is one
who blames others when himself is blameworthy,
who exhibits anger towards those
over whom he has no control.”
(A Sanskrit saying)
Q: What are performance and perception dimensions that a leader should be aware of? Be it in the corporate world or at home?
There is no doubt that you have to perform in the corporate world. But, more importantly, you should be aware whether others perceive your performance realistically. It does not suffice that you just perform your duty. It is your responsibility to see that the performance is perceived rightly too. You just can’t say “I did my duty” and overlook everything else. Your duty requires that others see the subtlety in your performance. This is part of knowledge management in one’s action. Else, others will be in illusion and keeping such illusions alive is wrong knowledge management.
Also, remember that overselling what you have done to others, is poor knowledge management as well, and it opens up the possibility that people will judge you as having false pride. You have to perceive your performance realistically. You may imagine that you have performed very well even when you have not.
This ability to perceive your performance currently is important, for there is a factor called ‘imagination’ that messes up things. There is an imaginary self which creates an illusion of what you have done which thwarts real perception.
Q: Can you cite an example from the family front about the imaginary self in the context of relationships?
I know someone who hardly does anything at home, save for sweet talk. But she feels that she does a lot. Her husband and her mother-in-law feel that her actions fall far short of her imagination, but she imagines that she does a lot.
Her mind projects and she is unable to see it. When faced with facts, she plays the victim, and this victim identity of hers creates a psychological racket. Her tantrums subdue others. Deep within herself, however, she unconsciously feels that she isn’t doing much, and that leads to more inward pain.
Q: What should she do?
She should have a mentor who should be able to bring out how her imagination plays with her and distorts her mind. Also, as a value input, to be creative and not merely conceptual, something actionable has to be simulated and only then will there be growth. She should be led through the baby steps of doing things differently.
We have to understand that the ‘devil is in the detail’. Keep track of what is done, what is not done, and what could have been better. Such healthy parameters will help us in assessment. When a person is creative, their energy will be in the creative mode. Otherwise, the energy will be in the justifying mode, resulting from unwanted imaginative projections. Many people say imagination is nothing, it doesn’t matter. But imagination is something! It can create powerful illusions. That’s why we need to develop the quality of total alertness as an antidote to this inner chaos.
Q: What else should be known about the dimension of performance?
There was a time when the ‘win-win theory was popular. But now, it is called ‘win-win-win’! You win, others win, and the ecosystem also wins. This is the sensitivity that a leader should bring in. Let your mind think like a winner and make your clients or family feel that they are winning by buying your product or through the quality of your relationship. Then the whole ecosystem would experience joy.
This is the focus that a leader should have… be it at work or at home!
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